Ah, genius. It is so hard to describe. In the event that you, dear reader, have been trying to confirm that either (a) I am really brilliant or (b) I am really totally insane – here is how an average thought process goes in my head. Oh joy! Oh happiness! A glimpse into the inner sanctum (try to hold your applause).
This is a real, live thought process that happened to me today:
#1 – I don’t trust my judgment of people.
#2 – Well, men really.
#3 – Why do we date men and then marry them? Should we keep our options open.
#4 – There’s that M word again.
#5 – Why do married people in Austria wear their wedding rings on the right hand?
#6 – The wedding ring in Anglo-American cultures is worn on the 4th finger of the left hand, dating back to ancient custom which referred to the fourth finger of the left hand as containing the vena amoris or "vein of love” Hahahaha
#7 – Hmmm…Jewish couples wear them on their left hand, but it goes on the right during the ceremony.
#8 – Don’t think I could ever participate in a Jewish wedding ceremony. I don’t know if I could handle my vows including the words: With this ring, you are consecrated to me according to the law of Moses and Israel. I’m sorry – consecrated?
#9 – According to Dictionary.com, the word consecrated means: to devote or dedicate to some purpose; to make (something) an object of honor or veneration; hallow. Which way does this go if I’m consecrated to someone? Who is doing the venerating?
#10 – You know what I venerate? COFFEE. I should go support the flagging economy and git me sum.
And that, folks, is how genius is born. By my complicated and detailed intellectual thought process, I have single-handedly solved economic crisis around the globe – through the prudent and committed consumption of coffee. Which is where these meanderings invariably land me.
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