Scaredy Cat

This week I'm just a scaredy cat. I am overwhelmed by what I am doing. I'm mostly worried about money - about being able to support myself while I'm in Europe - where I won't be working. Maybe I can look into a work visa, but allegedly they are hard to get. It would be cool though to get a job a few nights a week waiting tables or slinging beer at the local pub. Just to bring in spending money while I'm in Vienna. I'm starting to worry about my savings being insufficient & that I'm leaving a job that - while I detest it & my trained monkey status - that provides me with the financial security to do what I am doing. I know that without big risks there are no big rewards...but it still frightens me. It's like when I was a kid & took swimming lessons from this lady who had a pool in their backyard back home. I was maybe 4. The way they got us into the water was making us jump to them into the deep end and when it was my turn...they missed me. I remember sucking in water & going under before they dragged me back up.

But I am an awesome swimmer today. So...if that is my metaphor...perhaps that's a good thing.

I don't remember WHO said it - I think maybe it is Sark - that when you step off into the darkness, you will either find yourself on solid ground or you will learn how to fly.

Let's hope so!